Sweet Sweet Summertime

Can I just say that summertime is my favorite time. well, maybe. I don't know...I LOVE fall. do I have to choose? summertime is my favorite right now (and when it's fall, that will be my favorite). I've never been good at making decisions. Anywho! Last night was one of those nights. Those perfect summer nights. Because nothing particularly special happened. And summertime is the only time where unspecial nights feel magical anyway. I got home from work, we made grilled cheese (on the panini press because they're sooo much better that way) and watched a movie on netflix. Then we walked a few blocks to the cutest little grocery store, Rosemont. We got peligrino's, a delicious 1/2 & 1/2 cupcake cookie thing, and an almond croissant. We took the long way home, stopped at the Eastern Prom, and sat in the grass drinking, eating, and squealing at how cute all the dogs were (ok, that last part was only me.) I may have been shivering a bit (the ocean breeze was chilly, and maybe I'm a baby, ok!?) but it was fine because he is always warm and put his arm around me. After awhile we slowly got up and trekked home. We grabbed the pup and sat on the stoop outside our apartment while the sun went down. She played, grazed (that's what I call it cuz she looks like a little cow eating grass), and intently stared at all people and noises. I pretended to be Kate from Titantic on the concrete slab on our stairs; with my arms out to my sides and everything, singing my heart will gone, and drew telling me I'm crazy; but I know he really liked it. Then, we did our lame nightly routine (packing lunch for work the next day will be the death of me!) and cuddled up in bed with the windows wide open, ocean breeze coming through, and Friday Night Lights on in the background. Perfect. Summertime. *the pictures with this post are from last week. i don't have pictures from last night because it was too good to stop and take pictures.

The Truth is..

I'm not content with being ordinary; but I'm not sure how to be anything but.

Planning your wedding is overwhelming, strange, a little too much, and beautiful all at once.

Trader Joe's has seriously addicting cupcakes.

There is nothing better than Portland in the summer and smelling the ocean from my doorstep.

My dog dreaming and whining every night is one of my favorite sounds in the entire world.

His hugs instantly make me feel calm; even after my worst of days.

I don't feel like a bride.  I don't think I will until I'm in front of him saying my vows.

I know what I don't want...that's easy.  It's figuring out what I do want that's tricky.

He has the weirdest sense of humor.  The kind that takes you by surprise and makes you laugh from your gut.  It's one of the best things about him.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S is and always will be my favorite show.  Even after having watched the discs so many times that they're starting to skip.

Sometimes grilled cheese and beer at home is so much better than wine and a fancy date night out.

We have lived in Maine for over 5 years and had never been to Boothbay Harbor; until last weekend.  Road trips to new places are what summers are made for.

*all pictures taken by me & Andrew. 

Juice it up, baby

My bridal shower was this past weekend in my hometown in Massachusetts.  I wasn't entirely sure what to expect and felt pretty anxious about it.  Good news is the weekend was an absolute blast filled with fancy drinks, delicious food, lots of sun, gorgeous sunflowers, and some of my very favorite people in this world.   I turned into a big ol' cry baby when my mom asked if I had a good time.  I didn't think I'd get so emotional, but I was just felt so overwhelmed with happiness and love.  

My maid of honor took lots of pictures, but I have yet to see them.  

I'll post some here with more details on the day, once I get them.

SO instead, let's talk about juice.  Oh.My.God.  My Aunt bought us a juicer and it is insane.  

I can't believe how long I lived my life without one.  

We made our first juice last night: 2 green apples, 4 carrots, and 1/4 in of ginger.  

It was bomb.  Do yourself a favor a get a juicer.  Or get engaged and ask someone to buy it for you.

That works too ;) 

Sparks

Sometimes you need to just dress up, put your best glittery headband on, and play outside with sparklers on a random Thursday night.   It helps to have a fiance who is a photographer 

and who always insists on taking my picture.  

These pictures look cute, but let me tell you, there were quite of few weird looks coming our way.

 All in a days work. 

Little Letters: Jenny, Pizza, and Pants

Dear Jenny Lewis -

You made my dreams come true last night by playing at the State Theater.   Your set was unreal.  Your voice is pure magic and you are such a badass.  I love you. 

Dear Rain –
I’m not even mad that you made an appearance today. Mostly because I’m working and I’m selfish. I don’t want others to play in the sun if I can’t. Also, be a love and stay away this weekend. Please & Thank you.

Dear Bridal Shower –
I’m 50% excited for you and 50% feeling really awkward about you. Is it just me or is it weird to have dozens of people watch you open presents…presents that you demanded via a registry… don’t even get me started on how awkward I feel about registries. I hope there’s champagne and cupcakes and lots of hugs.

Dear Office –
Stop being so quiet. I’d like to eat my bagel chips in the comfort of my own cubicle and not have every one listen to me loudly chew.  P.s. I’d like my own office…with a window…DREAM BIG! 

Dear Grey Pants –
I regret wearing you today. You make me look frumpy and boring.

Dear Bright Green Pants –
I’m sorry I neglected you today. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Dear Mel –
Get on that plane faster! Nashville has no business keeping you any longer. You are mine for a full 72 hours starting Friday.

Dear Pizza –
I want to eat you tonight. But alas, we are broke so scrambled eggs and toast it is.

Dear Nose –
I’m sorry I burned you this weekend and now you’re peeling. You look creepy.  (Note to self: wear more sunscreen. this is not a good look)

Dear Andi –
You have horrible taste in men and if I wasn’t obsessed with reality TV I would ban The Bachelorette from my weekly routine. Also, please change my mind about you…pick one of the dorky men and not the “former pro baseball player” who thinks he’s the shit.

A-Musing

 

So my friend Abby totally rocks and she signed the 3 of us (me, her, and Em) up for the soft opening of a new paint bar on Commercial Street in Portland; Muse (do you get the sweet play on words I did in the title now?!...I know I'm so creative.)  

Anyway, I’ll be honest, I was excited but a bit anxious about painting in a group setting with people looking over my shoulder and with people who are far better painters than I. But ya know what? It was freakin’ awesome. It was completely inspring and carefree and fun. There were people there who had never picked up a paint brush before and people (like Abby) who are naturally artistic. No one judged. It felt like a safe place to make ‘mistakes’…if that’s even a thing when we’re discussing art. It was a place to enjoy a glass of wine, learn some a few techniques, and do something new with my girlfriends. Plus the decor was rad and made me so happy. (loving me some marquee sis gns!)

The instructor was super bubbly and lovely. Exactly what you’d expect and art instructor to be like. You could tell she was so pumped to teach us and to see our creative juices flowing. We were given basic instructions (type of brushses, what they do, how to mix paint colors, basic brush strokes) and overall guidelines on what to paint. We were encouraged to change it up how we wanted though; leave things out, add things in, choose different colors, etc. My favorite part (besides the wine!) was seeing how different our paintings came out. Em chose to paint closer to the example, mine was similiar but I added warmer colors, and Abby had a slight artistic crisis halfway through and completely painted something different while still keep in some of the elements. It was also pretty sweet that we were part of the 1st group of “painters” to try out the studio. Abby may or may not have branded the table with our initials to commemorate the occassion…

Nights like last night remind me how healthy and refreshing it is to get out of my comfort zone and try something new; something that makes me nervous. Sometimes I fall victim to my anxieties. I generally worry and have intense anxiety most of the time. Instead of letting that take over my mind; I need to push myself to work through those burdening thoughts because 9 times out of 10 what I am sweating over ends up being something I really loved. Plus I just have the craziest, loveliest friends.

Thoughts

I went for a walk around this gorgeous neighborhood near work today. My poor eyes needed a break from the computer screen, my lungs needed fresh air, and my skin needed some vitamin D. My walk was peaceful – no traffic noise, no ear buds. Just the sounds of nature and my heart beating. I feel unsettled today. Not totally present.

Today has me yearning for bare feet, running through the tall grass, climbing big birch trees in grams front yard, games of wiffleball, reading in the shade, tomato sandwiches at the beach, salty air, big hugs, bikes rides into town for candy and ice cream, bonfires and s’mores, closing exhausted lids and dreaming under the stars.

Lately I’ve felt incredibly nostalgic. I’m missing my youth and the carefree joy that went with it. I’m missing those important people that are no longer here with me.